breaking breath

with my soul. it was our last firefly 

that reasoned with the candles glow. 

i flowed through the outside and

converted the lavender back into

a distant hole; where she howled and

i fell through her cracks.

we never really could, 

sleep in our dreams...so i kept

us, limb by limb, fracture by broken, 

little by breathtakingly 

big.

will you be disappearing into 

silver threads orchestrated

by that machine?

if so, i guess i already left you

after i

said

wrote

lifted, that.

love me, once more.

it will be the last.

fired frost

to breathe in the 

air where fire fists

bleed through the cold

and beach sand

was lit to brighten 

it.

quiver like sand across my skins eyes'

and fainted corpse blood still

ponders a suicide tear.

will you be enough if i

decide to live, deeper

and wider than your plastic

eyes?

eyes shut as tight as

her grip and i fear no one will

hear my,

blind.

better than never

is dying to remember how

to give birth to love.

my body feels like a mesh net;

filled with drips

of broken-in-half tears.

from my womb that you 

altered with opaque needles

and bold,

lavender

thread.

it is not me

it is not you

it is the scared.

the, beneath the far 

fear and through me.

teach me

how to love.